This is a competitive business. I just do this during the day.
At night and weekends we do signs. I got a degree in Graphic Design.
But the thing is, the competitors down the road,
they're getting all the business
'cause the guy's got two degrees in Graphic Design.
And I need to find out what he's charging some of these people
and I need somebody to break into his office and find out
and then maybe throw some gasoline all over the place
and "drop a cigar" or something
and put an end to that A-hole.
You're talking to me?
You must be talking to me 'cause I'm the only one here.
You're talking to me?
Ow!
PEYTON REED: Give me one more. Paul, give me one more. Paul!
You know that he was arrested for stealing a smoothie machine.
Two smoothie machines.
- Right, man? - Yes.
I love this machine. It's like, you put anything in. Smelt.
You can put in yak's milk. We put in pig's fat.
You mix together, it tastes like banana.
It always tasted like banana.
What can you tell me? Can you train me?
What? No. I'm not gonna train you to steal.
I trained you how to scoop sherbet into cones.
(BLEEP)
(GROANS)
I can't do Ant-Man anymore.
We're (BLEEP).
This thing, you can put anything in it, it make it into juice. Like hair.
That was my least favorite. The hair smoothie was not the best.
I'm C-3PO. Artoo.
(CREW MEMBERS LAUGHING)
It's quite a growth...
It's quite a growth spurt... (STAMMERING)
Why can't I talk?
Cuff that (BLEEP).
You should cut it.
- I heard you. I heard you. I heard you. - (GASPS)
One time, we had the blueberry and then I had a problem in bathroom.
So, I was... (COUGHS)
- It was pretty bad. - It was...
That was when you found out you were lactose intolerant.
I have gas.
You're fired, buddy. (CHUCKLES)
But I'll tell you what. I can set you up with uh...
a dozen gallons of any flavor you like.
And you can eat ice cream for breakfast. You can eat it for lunch.
I've had it three times in a day and I... I feel great.
REED: Cut.
(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
(CREW MEMBERS LAUGHING)
- (LAUGHS) Get it? - Why don't you come with me?
Are you gonna kill me? Don't do anything.
Should I just take them off now?
Holy (BLEEP).
REED: And cut.
SCOTT: ls there anything I can say to make you change your mind?
(SIGHS)
You could say that you just purchased Baskin-Robbins
and you have a whole new plan for the company
that's hiring crooks and criminals and felons and monsters.
I expect that kind of (BLEEP) from Cold Stone Creamery.
(BOTH LAUGHING)